Saturday 10 March 2018

Is There a Doctor in The Horse...?





[Inside the Wooden Horse]
ODYSSEUS: 
Absolute silence, everyone. 

DOCTOR: 
Well, but I, I 

ODYSSEUS: 
That includes you, Doctor. 

DOCTOR: 
Oh. 

(The Horse jolts violently as the Trojans begin to haul it towards the city.) 

ODYSSEUS: 
Well, this time Troy will be destroyed.

[Priam's palace]

(Troilus escorts Vicki to see King Priam.) 

PRIAM: 
Come on in, Cressida. Come in, both of you. 
Has Troilus told you the news? 

VICKI: 
Yes, it's marvellous, isn't it? I'm so pleased. 

PRIAM: 
Pleased? I should just say you are. You did it. 

VICKI: 
I... 

PRIAM: 
Oh, yes you did. I don't know how, but that's your own business, I suppose. 

Now, why on earth couldn't you tell us this was going to happen?

You would have saved yourself all those hours in the cells, and us a great deal of worry. 

CASSANDRA: 
She didn't tell you because it's some form of treachery. Don't trust her, father. 

PRIAM: Oh, stuff and nonsense. Oh, go and feed the sacred serpents or something. If you can't be pleasant at a time like this, Cassandra, I don't want to see you. Oh, Paris! Have the Greeks really gone? 

PARIS: Every last one of them, or so it seems. 

PRIAM: 
There you are, Cassandra. I told you so. 
Oh, do for goodness sake, smile. 

PARIS: 
But, more important, I think I've just found the Great Horse of Asia. 

PRIAM: 
You've done what? 

PARIS: 
Something uncommonly like it, anyway. 

PRIAM: 
What on earth are you talking about? 

PARIS: 
The Great Horse of Asia. 
Standing all by itself in the middle of the plain, about forty foot high and made of wood. 

PRIAM: 
Whereabouts in the middle of the plain? 

PARIS: 
Near the Grecian line. 
Look. You can just see it from here. 

PRIAM: 
Great heavens, I do believe you're right. 
It is the Great Horse of Asia. 

CASSANDRA: 
It's an omen. An omen of disaster. 

VICKI: (sotto) 
It is the Trojan Horse. But I thought you 

TROILUS: 
What was that? 

CASSANDRA: 
Yes, ask her! Go on, ask her! 
She knows what it is. 
It's our doom! 
It's the death of Troy, brought upon us by that cursed witch! 

PARIS: 
Now understand me, Cassandra. 
I will not have one word said against that horse. 

TROILUS: 
And neither will I against Cressida. 

CASSANDRA: 
Will you not? 
Then woe to the House of Priam. 
Woe to the Trojans. 

PARIS: 
I'm afraid you're a bit late to say 'whoa' to the horse. 
I've just given instructions to have it brought into the city.


Episode Four - Horse of Destruction
[Priam's palace]

CASSANDRA: 
Of all the idiocy, to have it brought into the city. 

PARIS: 
Why? That horse is in the image of one of our gods. 

CASSANDRA: 
It's a trick. My dreams have always been right and they foretell disaster. 

PARIS: 
Now were they right about that little temple? 
That has brought us nothing but good luck. 

CASSANDRA: 
Good luck you call it. The whole family besotted by that sorceress. 

PRIAM: 
Oh, I do wish you'd stop calling Cressida that. 
And I would call it luck to have the entire Greek army removed from our shores. 

Peace at last.

 Though the arrival of the horse is a little puzzling. 

PARIS: 
Well, Cressida probably arranged it, and the very sight of it just, just frightened the Greeks away. 

TROILUS: 
Where is Cressida? 

PARIS: 
Oh, she's probably down in the square watching them bring in the horse. 

TROILUS: 
Oh, then I'd better go look for her. 
I don't like her to go wandering round the city on her own. 

PRIAM: 
No, bring her back up here again. 
She'll get a better view. 

CASSANDRA: 
Katarina, go and look for the sorceress. 
I don't trust my lovesick brother. 

KATARINA: 
But, great priestess, the auguries said that 

CASSANDRA: 
Do you dare to question me? 

KATARINA: 
No. 

CASSANDRA: 
Very well, then. 
Go and watch for that girl.

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