Showing posts with label Crab People. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Crab People. Show all posts

Saturday 10 March 2018

Rule 1 — I Have Very Bad Posture


Rule #1 :
Stand up straight with your shoulders back

Rule #2 :
Treat yourself like you would someone you are responsible for helping

Rule #3 :
Make friends with people who want the best for you

Rule #4 :
Compare yourself with who you were yesterday, not with who someone else is today

Rule #5 :
Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them

Rule #6 :
Set your house in perfect order before you criticise The World

Rule #7 :
Pursue what is meaningful (not what is expedient)

Rule #8 :
Tell The Truth – or, at least, don’t lie.

Rule #9
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something you don’t

Rule #10 :
Be precise in your speech

Rule #11 : 
Do not bother children when they are skate-boarding

Rule #12 :
Pet a cat when you encounter one on the street


I'm on My Time with everyone 
I Have.Very. Bad Posture

— Kurt Cobain, Pennyroyal Tea



“A lobster loser’s brain chemistry differs importantly from that of a lobster winner. This is reflected in their relative postures. 

Whether a lobster is confident or cringing depends on the ratio of two chemicals that modulate communication between lobster neurons: serotonin and octopamine. Winning increases the ratio of the former to the latter.


A lobster with high levels of serotonin and low levels of octopamine is a cocky, strutting sort of shellfish, much less likely to back down when challenged. This is because serotonin helps regulate postural flexion. 




A flexed lobster extends its appendages so that it can look tall and dangerous, like Clint Eastwood in a spaghetti Western. 



When a lobster that has just lost a battle is exposed to serotonin, it will stretch itself out, advance even on former victors, and fight longer and harder.  The drugs prescribed to depressed human beings, which are selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, have much the same chemical and behavioural effect. In one of the more staggering demonstrations of the evolutionary continuity of life on Earth, Prozac even cheers up lobsters.

High serotonin/low octopamine characterizes the victor. The opposite neurochemical configuration, a high ratio of octopamine to serotonin, produces a defeated-looking, scrunched-up, inhibited, drooping, skulking sort of lobster, very likely to hang around street corners, and to vanish at the first hint of trouble. 

Serotonin and octopamine also regulate the tail-flick reflex, which serves to propel a lobster rapidly backwards when it needs to escape. 

Less provocation is necessary to trigger that reflex in a defeated lobster. 

You can see an echo of that in the heightened startle reflex characteristic of the soldier or battered child with post-traumatic stress disorder.”

Excerpt From: 
Jordan B. Peterson. 
12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos.


Leader of the Crab People[entirely red] : 
See now where we have been forced to live for a thousand years! But soon we shall rule the land above, and mankind will be gone!

Mr. Garrison :
Gone?? 

["Crab People! Crab People!"]

Crab Man 2 :
Crab people are too small and weak to take over man by force, and so we came up with our perfect plan! 

[another crab person walks over to a closet full of human shells, all of them replicas of the Queer Eye guys. The crab person climbs in a Carson replica and closes the shell behind him. Carson's replica comes to life]

Carson replica :
If you can't beat Man -
[drops down from his hook] 
change Man!!!

Mr. Garrison :
I knew it! 
I knew gay people would never do this to their own kind! 
[some crab people restrain him and Mr. Slave]

Crab Leader :
When all the world is metrosexual, the crab people shall finally reign supreme!! 

[raises his pincers and claps. The other crab people join him and clap]

Crab People :
Crab People! Crab People!

Crab Solo :
Taste like crab, talk like people.
Crab People!
Crab People!

Kyle :
You'll never turn ME into a metrosexual! 
I like being a dirty, filthy little boy!

Crab Man 2 :
[approaches
Very well. If we can't make you into metrosexuals, then we will make you into crab people! Take them!! 

[the crab people swarm in and separate the hostages. Some of them take Kyle into Crabwear and select a crab outfit for him to wear. Then they take him to Crab Salon and put antennae on his hat, then they take him to get a facial, then they march him down the underground road]




" Maybe you are a loser. And maybe you’re not—but if you are, you don’t have to continue in that mode. 

Maybe you just have a bad habit. Maybe you’re even just a collection of bad habits. 

Nonetheless, even if you came by your poor posture honestly—even if you were unpopular or bullied at home or in grade school —it’s not necessarily appropriate now. Circumstances change. 

If you slump around, with the same bearing that characterizes a defeated lobster, people will assign you a lower status, and the old counter that you share with crustaceans, sitting at the very base of your brain, will assign you a low dominance number. 

Then your brain will not produce as much serotonin. 

This will make you less happy, and more anxious and sad, and more likely to back down when you should stand up for yourself. It will also decrease the probability that you will get to live in a good neighbourhood, have access to the highest quality resources, and obtain a healthy, desirable mate. It will render you more likely to abuse cocaine and alcohol, as you live for the present in a world full of uncertain futures. It will increase your susceptibility to heart disease, cancer and dementia. All in all, it’s just not good. 

Circumstances change, and so can you. "

Excerpt From: 
Jordan B. Peterson. 
12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos.




Reverse Arm-Fold :

The physical inverse of the Badass Arm-Fold, where the arms are folded behind the back. 

The hands may be clasped together just behind the waist (more common in the West and pictured at right), or gripping the opposite forearm higher up (more common in the East). 

This posture generates strong connotations of patience and consideration.


There are four [FIVE] basic character types who use this, for their own reasons:

1) Martial artists, especially the Old Master, who will hold this pose constantly while his hands are not occupied, unless he's a monk, in which case one hand will hold a prayer position in front of his chest.

2) Old people of the Asian persuasion in general, who take the same pose but lean forward as if for balance.



3) The Contemplative Boss. See the picture on that page for an example.

4) Military personnel, while on duty but not actively engaged in some activity (for instance, in formation but not being inspected, waiting for inspection formation, or waiting to be told to form up for inspection). The stance shown in the picture is known as "Parade Rest" in the US military (and possibly elsewhere) and "At Ease" in The Commonwealth.

[ 5) Groucho Marx Impersonators ]



Villains are also fond of the pose, as it allows them to lean forward intimidatingly and not look silly as they would if they just let their arms hang loosely. 

Compare and Contrast Coy, Girlish Flirt Pose.